So much has been on my mind... work, money, family- and lack of. And moving. That is always on my mind! But it is getting to be closer to reality! Credit scores are improving so we can actually start seriously considering home purchase. My only issue is that I desperately want out of Salt Lake County, but Troy has a great job.
I was looking online at homes- my search was for homes with at least 5 bedrooms and 2 baths. No, Troy and I don't need a home that big... but we have a family! I have these amazing people living with me who are my family and I have no plans to ever move without them or force them to leave my home- they are my family, and I am truly to a place that I can't imagine life without them here!
We have some debt to clear up before we can consider purchasing, but if I don't dream it- I can't manifest it- right? I start my job finally this week, Katina probably has a new job much closer to home, TC is looking for work, and Troy is driving for Uber more... we will get on top of things and start working toward our dreams!
My depression is still bad, but I know once I start working and finances get a bit more stable, the depression will start to lift a bit. Nothing will take it away as long as other people I care about continue to allow their own lives to be destroyed, and the bonds I once had stretch further apart. But I can't do anything about that, I just need to be distracted, and believe that one day things will be better.
I started a huge project in the yard that took almost 2 weeks- that was an awesome distraction from everything, altho it was difficult to work when it was 100 degrees outside! most work was done before 10am and after 7pm! It may not be my house, but it is my home and I will continue to do things to improve it as long as I am here.
I'm happy that July is about done, least favorite month of the year! I don't like the fireworks! August may be the hottest month of the year, but that's when the good rides are and it's closer to September... when it starts to cool off.
Went for a 22 hour road trip this past week... went to pick up 2 of the kids friends, one from St. George, one from Blythe. Drove straight thru. Pretty fun but very exhausting. They came up to experience the 24th of July... strictly a Utah holiday. A little stressed having 2 extra people here, but for the most part they are very good kids.
Just a reminder to anyone who reads this... it's ok to not be ok- depression sucks, but you don't have to do it alone! Reach out for support!